Get the Guy

Get the Guy: learn secrets of the male mind to find the man you want and the love you deserve 
By Matthew Hussey
HarperWave, 2013. 250 pages. Nonfiction.

Get the Guy is a in depth guide on how to to understand the male psyche and practical techniques to actually get a man you want and deserve. Matthew Hussey is a leading relationship expert and gives an honest male perspective to many of the typical behaviors displayed by women when dating. He’s like a real life Hitch!

The first part of the book talks about finding the guy- how it’s a number game, you need the mindset of the chooser, and the traits of a desirable woman, building conversations into dates, and online dating. Then he talks about how to get the guy- the formula for attraction, insecurities, creating a great date, intimacy, premature obligation, and why some women get stuck in the friend trap. Then the third part, which I found to be the best part- how to keep the guy. He tells about how to tell if he’s right for you, what guys really think about commitment, and how to create a love that lasts. Each section has so many seemingly obvious tips and insight that it’s silly that every single woman isn’t applying them.

If you are single this is a must read!  Rehashing and talking things out with girlfriends is never as effective as you hope in understanding the guy’s mind. This book is a treasure of sound very real advice. Every guy and relationship is unique but the perspectives found here are very practical, useful and written in a very approachable way. I have already begun applying its principles (with success!) and recommended it to several friends.

Queen of fashion : what Marie Antoinette wore to the Revolution

Queen of fashion : what Marie Antoinette wore to the Revolution
By Caroline Weber
Holt, 2006. 412 pages. Nonfiction, biography.


In a unique approach to biography, Caroline Weber applies Marie Antoinette’s interest in fashion to tell the story of her life. This tragic queen’s life is punctuated with interesting fashion choices and became both her means of expressing power and her ultimate downfall. Beginning with her arrival to Versailles as a young girl, and ending with her death during the French Revolution, we see Antoinette’s human and courageous side as she faces internal and foreign political opponents. This books adds a new facet to Marie Antoinette scholarship and tells her tale in a very approachable, almost novel-like readability.

I had a very skeptical view of Marie Antoinette before this book but Weber’s biography gives new light to why this French queen behaved as she did, and more importantly why she dressed how she dressed. I grew more sympathetic towards Antoinette and even though I knew she would be killed, I dreaded and mourned that outcome as the book progressed. Learning how fashion choices can shape culture and political outcomes is especially fascinating to me because it is an ever present undercurrent of society but so often discredited or forgotten. I would recommend this book to those interested in a more scholarly biography or an interest in fashion, French history, art history, or influential women.

Eat, Pray, Love

Eat, pray, love one woman's search for everything across Italy, India, and Indonesia
By Elizabeth Gilbert
Penguin Books, 2006. 334 pages. Biography, Nonfiction.

Eat, pray, love is an engrossing biography about finding oneself after tragedy and change. In rather rash turn of events, Elizabeth Gilbert finds herself newly divorced, heartbroken from a passionate love affair and in real need of some soul searching. She begins her journey in Italy where she has taken a vow of celibacy, focusing instead on learning Italian and eating- eating lots and lots of pizza. After gorging herself in the rich Italian culture, Liz makes her way to India where she spends time focusing on her spiritual self. There she practices meditation, yoga and sheds her newly acquired pizza weight, as she muddles through her emotional issues. Next she is off to Indonesia where she unexpectedly meets a man and slowly falls in love again. With each new place she meets people that help her learn and grow to arrive at a more confident, happy and self-aware state of becoming.

As I read this book I couldn’t put it down. Learning about the various countries made me have serious wander-lust and crave that kind of cultural immersion. I have been a yoga fan for years, so the idea of in-depth yoga retreat sounds hard and exciting. I am a sucker for a love story, especially when the woman is not expecting a relationship to appear.  However, since finishing the book the whole thing seems rather self-indulgent and fantastical. Most people cannot drop their entire life, no matter how hard it becomes, to go on this kind of exceptional adventure. It is an entertaining read, but I would caution readers to avoid equating themselves to the author, or aspiring to have similar experiences.

The Power of Everyday Missionaries: the what and how of sharing the gospel
By Clayton M. Christensen
Deseret Book, 2013. 152 pages. Nonfiction.

This book gives very practical ‘how-to’ advice to be a successful member missionary. After service as a full-time missionary,  life can easily become too busy for meaningful missionary service, but Christensen teaches, from personal experience, how to overcome obstacles inherent to modern life and missionary work. Finding people to teach is the hardest part of missionary work and most members of the church do not realize or accept responsibility that they should be the finders and missionaries are the teachers. By setting time sensitive goals, inviting strangers and friends to hear the missionaries, and by being genuine and forthright, great success can be found. It’s not about the number of people baptized but rather the intent of your heart and efforts in building the kingdom of God that matters.

While serving a full-time mission, I felt confident that when I came home I would just be the kind of member missionary that the missionaries hoped and prayed for. As I read this book I felt inspired and invigorated to share the gospel but also intimidated because it meant a lot more preparation and work on my end than I previously imagined. Christensen shares lifestyle changes and best practices that help him and his family share the gospel. This book is written in a very approachable and applicable way, making the never-ending task of missionary work seem doable and fulfilling.

5 Love Languages

5 Love Languages
The Secret to Love that Lasts
By Gary D. Chapman
Moody & Northfield, 2001. 208 pages. Nonfiction.

Dr Chapman explores the different ways that men and women can learn to communicate with their loved ones. Discovering your personal love language, as well your loved one’s, can give specific direction to your behavior and change the way people feel loved. The 5 love languages Dr Chapman teaches about include: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. Love is a choice, and by choosing to communicate with the love language that your spouse needs and responds best to, you are filling their love tank thereby creating a happier, lasting relationship.

This book includes helpful and introspective quizzes, anecdotes and extensive insights from Dr Chapman’s work as a counselor. I learned more about myself and the ways that I like to receive acts of love. I could better see how my relationships are enhanced when I choose to love each person based on their unique needs. This is a very practical self-help book that can benefit adults in all their relationships.

LP